Life is Lonely, Death Makes Better Company
by Thaelos
Summary: Eponine has breathed her last breath but still exists. So what happens when a lonely spirit meets another. Short and Fluffy


Disclaimer: Not mine....Victor Hugo's....*sob*

"One day I will be loved in return."

At first I could not understand. It all happened so fast that I couldn't get a grip on what had just occurred. One minute he was there and then he just walked away from me. No, that was not right. Not me....not really. I seemed to be looking down on what I had been, now an empty shell.

"Monsieur Marius, wait!" 

He made no move to turn and face me. His hands pried greedily at a letter. I called to him again, but his eyes stayed fixed on the letter. Yes, I understood now. I no longer existed. This thought did not seem to stir me at all. I had never existed to him, anyway. It did not matter now. 

I watched him read the letter over and over, a smile of hope and joy spreading across his face. I felt pain sear through me. Did he care at all that I had left him? He hugged the letter to his heart, as though it were Cosette, herself. I felt broken, lost, and yet I could not cry. It seemed beyond tears. 

Marius turned and ran in the direction of the Barricade, his eyes alight with a new cause. He would fight for her, 

Not for me.

Not for me.

"May you be happy, Monsieur Marius," I murmured. For a split second he turned around. His eyes flickered to my corpse, my empty shell. He smiled bitterly and in someway I new he was saying 'Thankyou.'

Then he was gone, as quickly as he had arrived. The darkness had swallowed him up. I was alone again, on my own. 

Absent mindedly, I aimlessly glided into the darkness. I didn't know where I was going, I didn't care. Or at least that's what I wanted myself to think. Somewhere in my heart I wanted to join them, all of them at the Barricade. It was foolish, but I felt it was the only place that held meaning for me now. I slowly went towards the sounds of gunfire. 

I stood beside them as they continued to fight long into the darkest night. I could not fight with them but they had my hope. I watched each shot. I watched each moment of glory. I watched each man fall. All so brave, fighting for a cause, their little lives meaning nothing to them. I admired each one beyond any words. 

I knew we had lost, I saw our hope disappear long ago and yet surrender was unnecessary. It warmed me to to the bottom of my heart to know that they would fight to the death, die for the cause that could never exist.

One man stood alone atop the Barricade now. His dark hair blew behind him in the wind, his eyes fierce. He raised the flag high in the air, his courage never failing him. The stars shone bright above him, reflecting his courage. I stood behind him in admiration. 

Suddenly a gunshot erupted from the other side of the Barricade, louder then the rest. The man doubled over, wounded. His eyes never lost their ferocious glint as he fell from the Barricade, the flag about him. I wanted to turn away but my eyes would not leave the scene.The last man falling with the flag.

I had no fear. I was already dead. I climbed the Barricade and dove after this brave man. I spotted him at the base of the structure. He lay crumpled on the ground, the flag strewn about him. His eyes stared like an endless sea up at the Heavens. I observed the scene. Horrifying, and yet so beautiful.

I struggled towards him, leaning over his limp body. He was still breathing. A felt a painful sorrow for this man. Suddenly his eyes turned to me, staring straight at mine. He could see me. His eyes softened as he reached up towards me, like a child reaching for a mother. He was not afraid. Slowly I reached out and brushed his fingers. He grasped my hand tightly in his, his mouth moving but no words escaping his lips. He then relaxed his tense body and looked at me with tender eyes. I smiled weakly at him, confused and yet knowing exactly what to do. I felt with all my heart that this man should be in peace, die without regret.

"The Barricade will never fall," he whispered. "I will never let it fall."

With that his eyes closed in such peace. He seemed to understand me. Slowly his hand slipped from mine, despite my desperate tries to hold onto him. 

He was gone. I placed a hand beneath his head and brought it closer to me. Slowly I bent over him and kissed his forehead tenderly. I could feel the sweat on his brow. His skin was hot and feverish. The hair on the back of his neck was moist with sweat. Slowly and regretfully I let him go, my hand remaining behind his head.

I stayed with this corps for long hours, as though He were merely sleeping. He was the closest thing to what I was. I, a soul without a body. Him, a body without a soul. I watched his skin turn cold and his body stiffen. The sounds of the night grew thicker and again I knew I was alone. 

For one last time I decided to walk the streets and let me lonely soul contemplate. Only a few people still wondered the streets. They did not notice me; did not see me. I then realized that Marius was gone forever. He could not see me anymore. 

A sudden rage boiled through me. All my life no one had cared. Not a soul heard my voice which I had struggled to make heard. Now, I was where I had begun; no one even knowing I existed. Why was I still here? Was there no Heaven? Was this my own inner seeing of Hell; the place I lived and suffered in my whole life? I did not understand.

My rage subsided as I thought of the men at the Barricade. Their troubles had surpassed mine and yet they did not complain. Each dying for a cause without second thought; the flag only falling when the last man fell.

Perhaps it was time for me to let Marius go. I had no reason to hold on to him. I was dead to him and it should be the same for me. I calmed myself and leaned against a lamp post. I saw the stars clearly. The same stars that shone above the Barricade. The stars that had watched a brave man fall.

Why wasn't I up there? What had I done wrong? I wanted to join the men of the Barricade in the Firmament but I was stuck here. 

A thought arose in my mind. If I could not join their spirits then I would join their corpses.

As I walked a fog swirled around my feet and the few other people who walked the streets, but the skies were clear as ever. I wanted those people to see me.

I approached a man when I came nearer to the Barricade. He was kneeling beside a corps, removing it's ring. I felt blood boil. He rose, his face turning to me. I was dumbfounded. I would have gasped but my jaw was too tight. The man was my father.

I do not know why this surprised me. He had never cared for others. Yet I never thought he would drop this low. I watched him check the pockets of a young man, grinning all the while. 

I tried to forbid him. Countless times I stood in his way but he never saw me. He continued to strip the corpses of their finery. I was enraged. I tried still harder to make myself heard but to no avail. At last I lowered my eyes in dismay.

"What's different? You never cared for anyone but yourself."

I fled to the Barricade, smelling the gunpowder still thick in the air. Their was so much blood. I watched it drain into the gutters. I sped up, reaching the Barricade in silence. At first I thought I was the only one still there but then I saw him. He was sitting on one of the tables that had been used for the Barricade, leaning back against the other countless things. He looked lost and confused. His hair hung in his face, his eyes shadowed. The red of his vest was mixed with the red of blood on his shirt. He was fingering a red flag. It lay across his lap, torn in places. I knew he would never know I was there, but I attempted.

"Say you can see me, Monsieur," I murmured. To my amazement his unfocussed blue eyes turned towards me. His shoulders twitched.

"Yes, Mademoiselle," he answered, his lips tightening. Slowly I approached him, coming to stand infront of him. His eyes were locked to mine. He looked at me as though he knew me.

Suddenly it all fell in together. This was the man to fall with the flag. I was certain. But that was impossible, or....was it? He had died as well. Was it so implausible that he was stuck here like myself.

"Have you come to take me?" he asked. I stood looking at him stunned. The most I could do was shake my head. He looked confused and angered; so out of sorts he did not no what to think. "Surely you will not leave me here."

"I, Monsieur, cannot take you anywhere. Believe if I could I would but I'm a simple spirit, stuck here and not knowing why."

His eyes fluttered over the many corpses. He then shut them tightly, turning away and grimacing.

"I pray to God that they are not trapped here as well."

It seemed amazing how he instantly seemed to understand me. It was as though we didn't have to say anything. I wished that he were happy, that he had found his way to Heaven. It was not right. I felt myself become enraged by this.

"I don't understand. You, Monsieur, were so brave and died for a cause. You should not be here! I saw you die, it can't be fair."

"Yes, I remember you," he answered, shutting his eyes. "I thought you were an angel, then." He smiled bitterly, turning his head away from me, his eyes still shut. 

I stood with my feet rooted in pure shock. An angel? This man must have been mad and yet I wanted to take the pain he was feeling away. I wanted him to be happy, somehow.

"I, Monsieur, an-an angel? Surely-" he cut me off, his eyes filled with sorrow.

"I'm still not convinced that you aren't."

"No, of course not. I'm j-just Eponine," I stuttered with shock as I spoke. He nodded.

"Then I'm just Enjolras," he said, running a hand over a rip in the flag. "A man that thought he could make a difference."

He turned away from me, bowing his head and shutting his eyes. I ached with sorrow for this man. Slowly I sat down beside him, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"I know how it feels," I started, "All my life there was no one who cared. I made a difference to no one." I paused then continued to pour out my heart. "The man I loved hardly knew I existed besides the fact I lead him to the woman of all his dreams and desires. She was all he saw."

Enjolras chuckled to himself, mournfully. "Sounds like Marius. One day he just fell in love and has been lovesick ever since." he said more to himself than me. I felt my throat tighten.

"It," I swallowed, "was Marius."

Enjolras' head snapped around to look at me. At first his expression was that of shock, then it softened to pity.

"How did you live? Marius never stopped expressing his love for her. Poor Girl, it must have broken your heart."

I couldn't answer. My throat tightened. It was then that I realized that I was truly dead. Everything I once was had become memory. I looked back over my life, remembering those few happy times I treasured so dearly.I had the illusion when I was living that I was making some sort of progress, but now it seemed like anything I had worked for was gone. I felt a sorrowful loss and at the same time an accomplishment. Joy and grief mixed together, wanting everything and nothing at the same time. 

I placed my head in my hand. My shoulders shook uncontrollably. A soft sob escaped my lips. 

"It did, " I managed to choke.

Enjolras was at a loss. He had no idea what to do. For what seemed like an eternity he just sat there, looking confused and yet his eyes showed pity. I didn't really care if he thought me weak, it didn't really matter now.

Suddenly I felt a strong grip around my shoulders. I sobbed crying abruptly, raising my head to look into Enjolras' eyes. His brow was furrowed, his arm around me.

I was in shock. My family had never even wanted to touch me. I had always been a dirty beggar that no one wanted to be near. And yet somehow this man did not seem to flinch at the sight of me or recoil when he touched me. Again tears filled my eyes.

Inspite of all that had happened I began finally to feel relief. I leaned my head against Enjolras' shoulder, feeling warmth rush through me.

"You must think me a weak, foolish, stupid girl," I murmured, barely audible beneath my sobs. I felt Enjolras press his cheek against the top of my head.

"No," he answered. I felt the arm he had around me tremble. I turned my head to look up into those soft gray-blue eyes. Silent tears were now cascading down his soot covered cheeks. He then took me by the shoulders and stared at me firmly.

"If" -he started- "you are weak, foolish, and stupid, then so am I!" 

He gave me the first true smile I had seen in ages. I found myself smiling back and without hesitation I flung my arms about his neck. He was shocked at first but he embraced me with a warm, strong grip. I could feel his tears against my cheek, I could hear the sound of his shaky breath. 

I lightly placed a kiss on his jaw, tightening my grip around him.

"Eponine?" he whispered.

"Yes?"

"Neither of us have to be alone anymore."

I pulled back to look into his eyes. He placed a hand on my cheek and wiped my tears with his thumb, then continued.

"And as far as I'm concerned, this is heaven." 

He smiled and lightly kissed my forehead. 

For one split second I recalled my whole life, then it was washed away. All I knew was now. And it seemed to me that I was soaring amongst the clouds. I finally felt true happiness for the first time in my life. I stared into his eyes and smiled. One last time I embraced him, and for the first time in my life I felt that I was wanted, needed, and loved.

~~

Wow! was that corny or what? I know it was sappy but I had to get it off my shoulders. I'll probably write more like this, only next time I might add in a plot.


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